I decided not to run today. Half because I was asleep from all the food, and Half because I wanted to rest my shins for one more day without torturing myself. (more the former than that latter), and although I am not "OK" with it... I am accepting it. I am still icing my shins, and am hoping to be back to performance ready Christina tomorrow :)
I made some REALLY good outreach calls and texts this morning when I was feeling insanely unstable, and I started to feel a little bit better. I have to hold on to anger, frustration and resentments the only person that I hurt is myself... because I am the one that gets the beat down, not the person, place or thing that I am "UPSET" with. The woman I spoke with suggested that I try praying for the things I am angry at as a productive way to handle my emotions. I really appreciated her making this suggestion, and I will try to remember to use it, because I feel that it will really help.
I went to group therapy, and it seemed like ALL of us were in this state. That weird "active in our addiction and not really wanting to do anything about it" phase. Well, more or less that we are in "crisis" and aren't willing to tap into our healthier methods of coping at this time. The theme seemed to be,